in utero

Nirvana quickly recorded this dark, dense, dissonant declaration of despair on their own dime and had to fight with their label to release it.  The massive success of 'Nevermind' had left the band overwhelmed.  Cobain revealed:  "I needed time to collect my thoughts and readjust. It hit me so hard, and I was under the impression that I didn't really need to go on tour, because I was making a whole bunch of money. Millions of dollars. Eight million to 10 million records sold – that sounded like a lot of money to me. So I thought I would sit back and enjoy it. I don't want to use this as an excuse, and it's come up so many times, but my stomach ailment has been one of the biggest barriers that stopped us from touring. I was dealing with it for a long time. But after a person experiences chronic pain for five years, by the time that fifth year ends, you're literally insane. I couldn't cope with anything. I was as schizophrenic as a wet cat that's been beaten...For five years during the time I had my stomach problem, yeah. I wanted to kill myself every day. I came very close many times. I'm sorry to be so blunt about it. It was to the point where I was on tour, lying on the floor, vomiting air because I couldn't hold down water. And then I had to play a show in 20 minutes. I would sing and cough up blood.  This is no way to live a life. I love to play music, but something was not right. So I decided to medicate myself...When I was doing drugs, it was pretty bad. There was no communication. Krist and Dave, they didn't understand the drug problem. They'd never been around drugs. They thought of heroin in the same way that I thought of heroin before I started doing it. It was just really sad. We didn't speak very often. They were thinking the worst, like most people would, and I don't blame them for that. But nothing is ever as bad as it seems. Since I've been clean, it's gone back to pretty much normal."

The band wanted to work with indie producer Steve Albini because of his work with the Pixies and the Breeders and because they liked the idea of his method of recording with multiple microphones around a room to capture a more complete sound.  Grohl explains:   "Steve Albini was really famous for his signature sound. The sound that he got on his albums, it was no accident. There's a science to what he does. It was usually mostly recognized in the drums. So if you listen to the Breeders' first album 'Pod' or the Pixies' 'Surfer Rosa', or you listen to the Jesus Lizard album 'Liar', it sounds like a band in the room, but there's some sort of sonic element to it that nobody else could get. And Steve Albini was the only guy who could get that drum sound."

The band travelled to Albini's Pachyderm Studio in Cannon Falls, Minnesota and gave themselves two weeks in which to record.  The isolated location made it easier for the band to focus on recording.  Novoselic recalls:    "We had to prove ourselves to Steve. So, on the first day at the studio, we're all set up and ready to go and like, 'OK, Steve, we're rolling, right?' And he goes, 'We're rolling.' And so we play that song 'Serve the Servants'. And you know Dave counts us in and just goes, 'Bahhh!' And the song starts OK. And then we play this song and, of course, the ending falls apart, like every song on 'In Utero'. And so we finish the song, and Kurt and Dave and I look at each other and we're like, 'Yeah, that felt pretty good. How was it, Steve?' He's like, 'Sounds good.' And we're like, 'All right! We're going to do another song', like in one take. We won Steve over after that."

Cobain said:  "It was made really fast. All the basic tracks were done within a week. And I did 80 percent of the vocals in one day, in about seven hours. I just happened to be on a roll. It was a good day for me, and I just kept going...You hit and miss. It's a really weird thing about this record. I've never been more confused in my life, but at the same time I've never been more satisfied with what we've done."

The band's label was not pleased with the abrasive sound of the record and did not want to release it.  They worked with Scott Litt at  Bad Animals Studio in Seattle to augment  'Heart-Shaped Box' and 'All Apologies'.  They also sharpened the bass sound and increased the volume of the vocals on the rest of the album.  'In Utero' went to number sixteen in Switzerland; thirteen in Japan; eight in Austria; seven in Norway; five in Finland; four in the Netherlands; three in Canada and New Zealand; two in Australia; and number one in Sweden, the UK, and the US.  In the US, it made its debut at number one, despite the fact that some major chains refused to sell the album because of the artwork.  'In Utero' has sold over fifteen million copies worldwide.  







http://www.nirvana.com/




"All Apologies" hit forty-three in Belgium, thirty-two in New Zealand and the UK, twenty in France and Ireland, four on the US mainstream rock tracks chart, and number one on the US alternative chart. 


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0drC8qVMRk







"Heart-Shaped Box" went to number thirty-seven in France, thirty-six in the Netherlands, thirty-one in Belgium, twenty-one in Australia, sixteen in Sweden, nine in New Zealand, six in Ireland, five in the UK, four on the US mainstream rock tracks chart, and number one on the US alternative chart. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6P0SitRwy8




'Sappy' was a part of the sessions but became a hidden track on the 1993 AIDS-benefit compilation album 'No Alternative'.  It was also titled 'Verse Chorus Verse' (one of the working titles for 'In Utero') which is also the title of a song from the 'Nevermind' sessions that is often bootlegged as 'In His Hands'. 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suM9k-sx0Gk



'I Hate Myself and Want to Die'  was recorded during the 'In Utero' sessions under the title '2 Bass Kid'.  It wasn't included on the album and was released on 'The Beavis and Butt-Head Experience' compilation instead.   It was also the B-side to the 'Pennyroyal Tea' single.  Cobain called the song:  "Nothing more than a joke. And that had a bit to do with why we decided to take it off. We knew people wouldn't get it; they'd take it too seriously. It was totally satirical, making fun of ourselves. I'm thought of as this pissy, complaining, freaked–out schizophrenic who wants to kill himself all the time. "He isn't satisfied with anything." And I thought it was a funny title. I wanted it to be the title of the album for a long time. But I knew the majority of the people wouldn't understand it."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TP06kxW_M3I




http://www.phrases.org.uk/quotes/last-words/kurt-cobain.html









'In Utero' 
full album:

All songs written by Kurt Cobain unless otherwise noted.

"Serve the Servants" – 3:36
"Scentless Apprentice" (Cobain, Dave Grohl, Krist Novoselic) – 3:48
"Heart-Shaped Box" – 4:41
"Rape Me" – 2:50
"Frances Farmer Will Have Her Revenge on Seattle" – 4:09
"Dumb" – 2:32
"Very Ape" – 1:56
"Milk It" – 3:55
"Pennyroyal Tea" – 3:37
"Radio Friendly Unit Shifter" – 4:51
"tourette's" – 1:35
"All Apologies" – 3:51
"Gallons of Rubbing Alcohol Flow Through the Strip" (Cobain, Grohl, Novoselic) – 7:28


https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZGh95p3UpwxS2gfSC1LPa_J-c0McoLHU